Tuesday, May 4, 2010

I’m back.  Getting up at 4:00 AM after sleeping in a few days is brutal. 


John’s dad is doing okay.  Not great but okay.  He doesn’t move as well as he did 6 months ago so the visiting nurse is sending in a physical therapist to try to build up his strength.  John & I doubt it will do any good—Serge just wants to die.  That sounds melodramatic but I really don’t think it is.  He’s 87 years old; should have had knee replacement several years ago but refuses treatment – instead lives on Darvocet (spelling?) & is extremely lonely because he lives 300+ miles from anyone that even remotely cares about him; his own choice but still….The assisted living facility he lives in is very nice & should provide him with plenty of company but he refuses to leave his apartment.  So some of his “stuff” is self-induced but he’s 87 for crying out loud.  He has been considerably more pleasant to be around these last few trips so I guess I’m feeling sorry for hm.


We were taking by surprise by the weather.  I checked the forecast before packing to see temps in the mid-60s.  I didn’t expect it to be so warm.  It’s usually chilly when the temps are in the 60s.  Not so this past weekend.  We had to hit TJ Maxx for t-shirts!  Wow!


I am having second thoughts about doing a competition.  At all.  Ever.  I do not comply with my meal plans.  I enjoy eating my junk more than I want to do a competition.  I am not at all satisfied with my body comp but I don’t think putting this kind of pressure on my mind is helping.  I’m finding that I want to binge more than usual & then get into a lot of negative self-talk.  I do enough of that without adding pressure.  So I’m reserving the right to back out at any point but I’ll see how things play out this summer. 


Workout wise I did two of those Body Rock workouts.  Both were brutal.  I really enjoyed them—the time flew by.  Then we went for brisk walks for 45 minutes. 


Today I was back in the gym.  I did chest & arms.  I don’t remember everything I did but do know that I did 1 set of 8 chest presses with 75 lbs—another PB.  I followed up my weights with another Body Rocks workout.  I love the way they are mixed. 


Tomorrow I’m going to do legs & then a 3 mile run with Leanne.  UGH.    






1 comment:

Doin the Math said...

I'm glad you had the chance to go visit him. You just never know.... And it's amazing how much one's will to live (or not) actually does play into one's ultimate demise. It's sad when people push everyone away, and then at the end of their life, they're like, "Heeeeyyyy....where did everybody go?"

Good job on recognizing your thoughts/patterns re: competition. Smart to weigh that into your decision. Very smart. You know us. We'll be supportive no matter which way you choose. :)

A three mile run AFTER legs sounds brutal. Because I know how hard you work legs! :)

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