but failing miserably...I ate 3 cookies, a bag of chips, McDonalds for dinner, & a donut today. Fuck me.
I'm exhausted beyond exhausted. I couldn't fall asleep last night--was up until well after 11. I was wide awake at 3:15. At 3:33 I got up to pee thinking I'd sleep after that. Wrong.
Tonight--at 6:00 PM--I'm posting this, taking a glass of wine & going to bed. I'm going to take a sleeping pill if I'm not asleep by 8:00.
I have 3 more paintings to do but the stores are out of 5x7 canvases. If I can't get them by New Year's I'll have to pick them up in MD when I go down by John that week. I have to finish them before Jan 23 because they are gifts for a friend for her retirement. I don't want to take a chance that I won't get them finished.
I did run 2 miles yesterday. I'm hoping to feel better tomorrow & get in another 2. We'll see how I sleep tonight.
Off to bed now. Smooches.
4 comments:
(((Deb)))
I hate those sleepless nights. When I'm short of sleep that's when I find I'm most troubled by food cravings. It's like I'm trying to self-medicate. Hormones play a role too, of course. In fact, I think the sleeplessness is tied in to being a woman in midlife. Anyway, there's good physiological reasons for all of it, so don't kick yourself for being weak-willed or anything. Just do your best, and when you have the occasional slip-up, don't dwell on it. Just get back on track as soon as you can. We all have days when Meal #3 turns out to be a donut instead of 3 oz. of chicken breast and a half-cup of brown rice, and you know what? it's no big deal. Just make sure meals 4, 5, and 6 are clean, and you'll be fine. It's the big picture that counts, not what you do on any one day and certainly not at any one meal.
Also, I'm sure the fact that you've not been well enough to exercise is a factor. Exercise is a natural mood-elevator, and lately you haven't been able to get your fix. So you've been turning to food instead. Once you can exercise more, you'll be a lot less likely to do that, I think.
So, not to worry on that front at least.
Or those meals that are 3 donuts, in my case. I haven't been there in a while, but I know it could happen at any time.
"Ditto" to everything else Laura said. :)
Yep. What they said.
And once you've eaten something, please don't beat yourself up for it. It doesn't undo it and just makes it all so much worse.
mmmmmmmmmmmm..... donuts.
Ack, that's not a good food day. Hang in there... everyone needs a donut or a cookie once in a while. At least you are being honest about it too. Hang in there and hope you start to feel better soon.
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